Have you ever avoided talking to a woman just because she
was talking to another guy?

Or maybe you avoided approaching a group of girls with one
or two guys with them because you feared embarrassment just
because you ASSUMED that those guys were cooler than you.

There are a couple of reasons why most guys are too shy in
approaching women who are with other guys.

They think that the woman is "with" the guy, and assume he's
her boyfriend.

This isn't a real reason to not talk to a woman, especially
in a bar - it's a social setting where people meet other
people. Plus - she's not his "slave" - she's a human being,
not a piece of property, so she is free to talk to whomever
she chooses.

Approaching a woman who is "with" a guy often will make you
look extremely confident, and draw out his jealous side,
making him look insecure and weak.

The second reason why guys don't approach woman who is
"with" a guy points to a deep insecurity based on a simple
misconception.

Guys assumed that the "other guy" is stronger, cooler, or
somehow more powerful than they are. Men tend to be
threatened by other men.

This exist in an ancient survival strategy that has been
passed through human minds.

The social hierarchy is very subtle, and mostly unconscious,
and it's hard to tell who the more "dominant" person is in
any given interaction. So when a male is confronted by
another male, he doesn't know how dominant the other guy is.

As was probably common thousands of years ago, a guy doesn't
know if he will be embarrassed verbally.

So it's better to play safe by assuming that the other guy
is a threat. Guys that were too bold may have won a few
confrontations, but it will take a single loss to end up
dead or exiled from the game.

And then their genes were taken out of the "race" so to
speak.

Those guys that avoided confrontation and played safe are
the one that can successfully reproduce and survive.

The irony is that most of approach anxiety nowadays have the
basis on this hard-wired survival strategy - the false
assumptions of the guys will lead them to unnecessarily
avoid women.

The thing is, when you are in the bar or club and you see a
woman talking to another guy, you would think she's not WITH
him.

Usually, they JUST MET!

For many instances I've approached a girl with a guy
thinking it was her boyfriend, then only to find out that he
was just a random dude who just approached her. Or he was
just a friend or relative.

I think of all the times I completely avoided talking to a
woman because I saw her with another guy. I regret having
missed so many opportunities. Which brings me to my first
point:

YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT HE MEANS TO HER. DON'T ASSUME THEY ARE
TOGETHER UNTIL YOU SEE PHYSICAL EVIDENCE.

You will know it if you try to act and find out. Just
remember that in time that they are together you should be
alert an respectful, the guy may be the insecure jealous
type and may start a confrontation.

So use your head - just don't limit your options by making
false assumptions.

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